Past Tense

Actually i wit mt bee bee really very happy n xing fu.. i choose to said is i wanna to saty happy n dun wish to have any phobia.. when said it, i choose to forget liao.. sometime de obstacles is very big issue or our gap is from very far ahead.. Even de past is about 2mths times liao.. but de phobia is i always very afraid de.. our biggest quarrel is juz a few mths ago.. we almost break up n really is almost totally break up.. but luckily did not break up.. i dun know is our r/s strong, or shld i said that we plan to start afresh or shld i said that bcos of some issue that y u stay.. i really dunnoe... bcos of this bloody gal, u lie to me, becos of this gal u cheat me and also bcos of this gal u send her those contented msg to her.. i really very sad till de max.. even though sometime i really wish to end our r/s, but somehow when this things happen, i really feel very hurt.. somehow the knife is so sharp n stab till very deep in my heart.. When our r/s have abit shaky but u did not try ur best to hold it but keep on doing de same thing.. kiss,LC , hug pplus she give u love bite too.. but u lie to me that de love bite is ur other frenz give u.. somemore is a guy.. but i really not a fool.. i choose to not believe u that ur so called love bite is guy give u de.. but i still cheat myself to believe u.. even though i know is a lie.. haiz.. m i really very stupid to treat like a fool.. De day u go to Ph, u mention to me that u wanna go to relax urself but end up, juz a single few hrs bloody hrs, n u kiss or shld i said LC for 3gals... i did not do anything that let u down but end up u let me down 1st.. if u plan to play somemore( as ur age is young) but not settle down den wat for u still need to be with me, m i rite..
i m de age that i wish to settle down asap but not playing or fool ard.. ur lip, ur hug and even ur hands have gals touch.. i wanna to keep myself for stop thinking but sometime when u not ard, i will keep on have foolish thinking.. scared that u will like that treat me again.. that time u said u meet ur frenz but end up u meeting her.. somemore is 2-3weeks in a row.. u not me.. so u wont know how hurt m i.. i every nite was crying like hell..but u enjoy urself at camp( cos u msg her n she msg u openly).. when i see u at weekend den ur phone ring like hell.. ur msg also.. u was like busy like hell.. u only have times for ur msg n call but not on me.. do u still rmb how u msg to her infront of me.. even though i now think le, i really feel like crying.. i know today is our anniversary.. but i really wish to said out for this last n only times le.. i really hope that this really is de last time i can choose to forgive u n beileve u.. i also dunnoe y i still wanna forgive u.. all n almost all my frenz choose to leave u n dun care about u.. but end up i still soft hearted.. i hope that this is the last time i can choose to forgive u for the one last time.. even though i can dun mention or said.. but de wounds n scar will always n forever be there.. no matter how long it take, it will still de same.. i juz wanna take it easy n take it naturely.. Your lip have kiss other gals or touch other gals lip.. i really dunnoe u will have one more time like that ma.. I hope wont have anymore like this liao.. one time really enough liao le.. i choose to forgive u but i hope is one n only..